Tears

Salam :)

Not in the mood for updating blog actually. Its just that, im trying to keep myself busy. Hmp. Semalam first day sekolah since cuti CNY. I spent my whole day crying :/ Yelah, Mr. Superhero pergi asrama kan. & i dont know how to contact him.

Dah terbiasa message dia everyday, suddenly kena stop tiba-tiba, mana tk awkward. Sedih, gila. When i close my eyes, i hope that all these things are not happening to me. Sadly, i aint dreaming. This is reality, and you can say that reality sucks at times.

I guess i just have to be strong. & dont stop believing. I know, God is great. He will take care of us. I just have to be positive and be strong. Heart, please be strong.

At times, when i miss him, i'll stare at his picture. Or just stare at my phone, wishing for him to contact me. Aha keep on dreaming fatin. Oh um, dia call malam tadi :') I was so happy that i cried. Hahaha.

Time, please move fast. I want 12th march, i want holiday. So that i can talk to him. I miss him :'(

Nothing much today, woke up with.... i dont know wht feeling, idk how to describe. It.is.so.terrible. I listened to the voice msg he sent and i cried, again. Walk to school in tears, cried a lot at the perhimpunan. Alhamdulillah, i can still focus on my studies.

During english, we have to do some exercises. & i was talking about fawwaz to haziqah that time, i was so sad and i cried. This time i tell you, it hits me badly. I cried. The tears kept on flowing like it wont stop. I can see that mursyid and yong were surprised to see me in tears. Hello red eyes & nose.

Demmit, i feel like crying now. Fatin please please dont cry. I know he's doing fine there, its just me. Yep, its me. Im having trouble trying to live my daily routines without him. Going to school and knowing that he will never be in that school again. What a hurtful feeling. It hurts, a lot. Knowing that i wont see his face among all the prefects. Knowing that i wont see him again everytime i look into Zaba Putra. Its just that, this fact is too hurtful.

I think i should stop now. Please be strong fatin. Please.

p/s : fawwaz, kalau awak baca ni, kalau, i want you to know that im fine. kita masih boleh fokus, and i dont do anything stupid. so awak takyah risau eh ? dont worry about me too much, nanti jadi macam last year pulak. Take good care of yourself, i'll be here at BRP waiting for your return, xoxo<3